It’s a low fat, high fiber, low-cal, high protein, low cholesterol, anti-oxidant, free-range, organic, omega fatty acid, acai berry, UV protective, pro-union, anti-sweatshop, free trade, pro-choice, handmade, recycled and recyclable smoothie that costs $16.99, is blended via solar power, served in a burlap cup, and leaves a grainy film on the roof of your mouth – but no carbon footprint.